Gov. Gretchen Whitmer addressed the State of Michigan after a plan to kidnap her and other Michigan government officials was thwarted by state and federal law enforcement agencies. She started by saying thank you to law enforcement and FBI agents who participated in stopping this [...]
“This is your problem. Send in … get a bunch of Chippendales. Get ’em something tight….thong-like. He’s yours. Three, four – no less than three, I would say. Make one a blond.” – Brad Pitt explains to Ellen that using Victoria’s Secret models, Miss Americas and Kate Hudson were the wrong way to lure George Clooney onto her show. She says she’ll do it – and say they’re from Brad! The final piece of the puzzle.
Last week, I purposely avoided talking about “Rosie: Live.” I wanted to wait until the dust settled. During rehearsals and filming, Rosie had a great time and was thrilled with the show. Even when it was over, she was sure it was a huge success, despite one complaint from her kids – they didn’t like her make-up! That turned out to be the least of her problems. The ratings and reviews came in – and they were not good. O’Donnell decided those things didn’t matter; what she cared about was what her fans thought. Then the e-mails started coming in – and they were not good. She issued a statement on her Web site: “there will b no more. No ratings. Bad reviews. Yet still – a thrill 4me.” When asked when she knew “the show was a dud,” she responded, “Not ’til I got home and read the blog. If the bloggers didn’t like it, I knew it didn’t work.” Rosie did clarify one thing – the clip of Nancy Grace was NOT real. Rosie asked her to tape it for the show. Phew!
By the by, no one seemed to notice that one of Rosie’s dancers was sexy Nick Adams – probably because he was wearing clothes! To rectify that situation (so to speak), pick up the December/January issue of “Instinct” featuring coverboy Nicky. The pics in the mag sizzle, which is no surprise. And, needless to say, “Instinct” is smart enough to have Adams in various stages of undress. And wearing lots of make-up – not that there’s anything wrong with that. Still, do his abs really need that much blush? You can check him out on http://www.BillyMasters.com.
Spotted at Madonna’s Miami concert – estranged brother Christopher Ciccone and A-Rod. Not together, of course. Rodriguez was sitting with Maddy’s galpal Ingrid Casares, while Chrissy was clearly in a non-VIP seat. Maybe that’s ’cause he had to pay for his ticket!
Prior to Britney invading our domestic airwaves, she caused quite a scandal in London. She appeared on my favorite weekly show, “The X Factor” (kinda like a good version of “American Idol”). After the contestants all sang Brit songs, she took to the stage with what has become her standard lackluster lip-synch of “Womanizer” (note to Brit – bring Brandon Stoughton on the road with you). On the televised post-show, comedian James Corden went on the attack: “They’re all better than Britney Spears. I’m not lying. I mean, the song sounded great. But I’ve already got the CD, so I really don’t need to see someone come out and mime it. Here are a group of people not trained, not sold five million albums, not all of that stuff, coming out, singing live every week and being judged pretty harshly. Then out comes Britney Spears, mimes a sort of half-assed performance on the stage, and then leaves to go play at Heaven at midnight tonight.” Tell us what you really think! Something tells me, La Cowell won’t be booking James again anytime soon (did I neglect to tell you “X Factor” is Simon’s show?).
As if that weren’t enough, Brit did indeed show up at Heaven, where G.A.Y. was promoting a “Britney Party.” Except she stayed sequestered in the private VIP area on the balcony and occasionally waved to the common folks below. She never got up on the stage to even say hi, which invoked the wrath of the capacity crowd. And you know, there’s nothing worse than a group of bitchy British queens! The following day, the promoter took to the web to apologize for the fiasco. He made it clear that no one ever claimed Brit would appear or perform – in fact, people working the door made sure everyone who went in (and paid) were told it was unlikely she’d turn up. Of course, once she did, expectations were high and the crowd stood by the stage for hours, waiting for something to happen. Sounds like a big mess (not unlike when their security accused me of being a Cockney hooligan!).
Days later, John Barrowman (who was also on “X Factor”) turned up on BBC Radio 1 and exposed himself! This might not be so scandalous if it wasn’t captured on a webcam! Host Andy Grimshaw kicked things off by saying, “You’re famous, we’re told, for getting your willy out in interviews. Is that going to happen today?” And, poof, there it was. “I didn’t take the whole thing out, but I got my fruit and nuts out,” was how Johnny explained it – begging the question, what else does he have down there besides the fruit and nuts? Are there other members of the four food groups? BTW, only one person complained, which I suppose speaks volumes. And speaking of volumes, we’ll show you his fruit and nuts along with some meat and grains on http://www.BillyMasters.com.
With the economic doldrums, the daytime dramas are tightening their belts, bringing a blue Christmas to the Lucci and Hall homes. The “All My Children” brass has issued across-the-board pay cuts, and reportedly La Lucci’s salary is being slashed by 35 percent! But, that’s nothing – our very own Deidre Hall is being fired! Both she and Drake Hogestyn are being written off in early 2009. Everyone is saying they’ve been eliminated because they had the highest salary, but my sources whisper they’ll be back in short order – albeit in a diminished capacity.
“You can’t breathe and you can only use your legs.” How many times do you think Anderson Cooper uttered those words? Now he’s done it on camera – with Michael Phelps. Not only that, but he got Phelps out of his pants. This was on “60 Minutes,” with little Andy challenging Phelps to a race. Coop could dive in and swim freestyle, while Mikey had to start in the pool, swim under water, and only use his legs. This allowed Anderson to intone words he’s only dreamt of: “I got beat by Michael Phelps.” We’ll show the video and stills on http://www.BillyMasters.com.
BTW, Andy and boyfriend Julio Recio were snagged by the paparazzi traveling over the Thanksgiving holidays. Of course, this kinda news seems to go unreported in the mainstream press. But I bet everyone would run a pic of Anderson if he were back in those jeans with the swan on his ass!
I recently was chatting with porn super-couple Jordan and Arden Jaric, and they told me many people are obsessed with who’s topping who (which, I believe, was the name of an old Aretha song). Although Jordan has done the shtumping in each Falcon flick thus far, I happen to know they’re both “versatile” (and how I know is none of your business). Their latest release, “Malibu Heat,” features a flip-flop scene, which should satisfy everyone (it certainly satisfied me). Get this perfect stocking stuffer at http://www.FalconStudios.com. Incidentally, the boys sent me a special holiday pic, which we’ll post on http://www.BillyMasters.com – along with a link to their blog.
When Rosie’s delivering a pre-Thanksgiving turkey while Jordan’s getting stuffed, it’s definitely time to end yet another column. No room for a question or a blind item. In fact, no room for half the stories I wanted to share this week. I’ll post some of them on http://www.BillyMasters.com, the Web site that keeps on giving. Even if I don’t publish an “Ask Billy” question, I respond to each and every e-mail. Feel free to write me at Billy@BillyMasters.com and I promise to get back to you before Barrowman does a commercial for Honey Bunches of Oats! So, until next time, remember, one man’s filth is another man’s bible.