By Tara Cavanaugh
ANN ARBOR-
Judy Shepard and Chris Armstrong each graciously accepted awards at an annual fundraiser for the Jim Toy Community Center on April 2.
Shepard is the mother of Matthew Shepard, the college student who was beaten and left for dead on a fencepost in Laramie, Wyo. in 1998. Since then, Shepard and her husband created a nonprofit organization, the Matthew Shepard Foundation, which lobbies for gay rights and protective legislation. The foundation pushed for the Matthew Shepard and James Byrd, Jr. Hate Crimes Prevention Act, which was passed in 2009.
Armstrong is the openly gay president of the student body at the University of Michigan, where the fundraiser was held. Last fall, he was harassed by Assistant Attorney General Andrew Shirvell, who was eventually fired – but not before Shirvell's blog about Armstrong received national media attention.
Jim Toy told the audience that Armstrong "exhibited unparalleled leadership, humility, patience and grace under homophobic assault, under the intrusive and intense scrutiny of newspapers and television." Addressing Armstrong directly from the podium, Toy said, "This award must inadequately thank you for your witness to justice."
The evening was also a celebration of the renamed Jim Toy Community Center, formerly known as the Washtenaw Rainbow Action Project.
Board President Linda Lombardini told the audience that the struggling community center was unsure if it should keep its doors open, but a survey of members showed full support for the center. She said they considered renaming the center after many famed activists: "We decided there is only one name that is synonymous with the TLGB movement in southeast Michigan, and with the battle to squash transphobia, homophobia, racism, sexism and bullying and an unfailing commitment to the justice that ultimately will lead to peace: Jim Toy."
The fundraiser was organized by the U-M Spectrum Center, which Toy originally founded, and OUT for Business, an LGBT group in the Ross School of Business. The evening was sponsored by MillerCoors, Keith Orr and Martin Contreras and local businesses.
A mother speaks
When her son, then 18, came out to her during a phone call, Shepard said she already knew.
"I firmly believe that anyone who has a loved one in the gay community knows, right here," Shepard said, pointing to the back of her head. "We all know. The hard part is bringing it up here," she said, pointing to her forehead. "Because that requires commitment and action. Back here, it's still just a notion. Up here, it's real."
Shepard said Matthew was accepted by his family when he came out, but she doesn't know what his life was like at school. "If he had been hassled, I'm not sure he would have shared that with us," she said.
"He was always open to the debate, had extreme feelings about what was right and what was wrong, and never felt the least bit hesitant in speaking those opinions. Actually, that trait scared me more than his being gay," Shepard explained, which caused the audience to chuckle.
"But as parents our job is to worry about our kids, gay or straight," she said. "Society and the environment that still exists is treacherous. We have a long way to go.
"We have years of vision ahead of us. We have a president who supports us. A congress that is moveable, sometimes, and the movable part is now your job," Shepard said. "You need to elect proper people, you need to vet them, you need to support them, and you need to let them know when they don't please you, and you also need to let them know when they do please you. They need to know that you have their backs so they can continue to support your decision. That's your responsibility. You can't just vote, and think your job is now over. It's a great responsibility, as well as a privilege. Please don't lose sight of that."
Shepard closed her remarks with a quote from John F. Kennedy, Jr.: "Anyone can make a difference, and everyone should try."
