Parting Glances: Inner Office Memorandum 2050

Well, there was Jay Hovah, CEO, minding his own damn corporate — military/industrial complex — business when along comes a cataclysmic stock market crash (Red, White, Blue Chip Shares wiped out) and, wouldn't you know it, Mr. Big Guy gets frantic calls to give directions to various and Sunday — er, sundry — boards of tax-exempt directors.
But, as we know all too well what happens in the game of "The Big Buck Stops Here," somebody several floors below executive penthouse gets the blame. Usually it's someone who works on the mezzanine and has the last name of Pariah, Outsider or Them. First name Bruce, Rusty or Ellen.
And as Jay Hovah is away most of the time touring the Milky Way, showing up fashionably late at nova openings, Big Bang bashes, parallel universe debutante balls, interstellar raves uncharted, his PR Department (floors 3 through 16, one John flush for all) scrambles to provide spin when bad things happen to shareholders.
Seems these coverups date back to humankind's creation, which we are led to believe by Jay Hovah's spinsters was a mere 6,000 years ago when Eve — a ribbon File Clerk II, with no marketable shorthand or typing skills — was fall guy; and hubby Adam lost life insurance, DP benefits, visitation rights and in-the-buff landscaping privileges. (Go figure.)
Today's fig leaf specialists needn't worry. If Jay Hovah's credibility can survive the Great Holocaust Debacle (6 million premium shares), the World War II Crash (50 million) and Iraq (25,500-plus), it's more than likely there'll be "strategies of reassessment" delegated for a long time to come.
Oh, yea verily, a footnote: Jay Hovah lists as CEO under aliases to a plethora of corporations — The Twin Towers of Babel Conglomerate — most of which have conflicting interests, services, products, with varying guarantees and liabilities.
Read the small print before you sign on the dotted line or mortgage your air-conditioned mental lifestyle.
A sampling from the PR bucket brigade is worth sharing, as there's every reason to believe that us LGBT types are being set up for several more pokes in the eye. (We can either duck, poke back or unite to remove the beam in our adversary's overly dilated pupils.)
Here's one past-the-bucket item: "A leading Muslim cleric says that the tsunamis which devastated South Asia were Allah's punishment for allowing gays into affected countries." (ReligionJournal.Com)
This comes from LifeSiteNews.Com: "Israel's Chief Rabbi Shlomo Amar commented on a recent catastrophe saying, 'G-d is angry' and 'We must pray more and ask for mercy. The nations of the world are obligated to observe prohibitions against murder and illicit sexual relations.'"
LifeSiteNews offers a baa-baa black sheep excuse: "In the Gospel of Luke, Chapter 13, Jesus himself spoke of a disaster, noting that those who perished were not more evil than others — (Isn't that special!) — but that it was a warning for all to repent."
And, lest we forget, there's this 9/11 myopia from Dumbo ear flapper Rev. Franklin Robertson Falwell: "I really believe that the pagans, and the abortionists, and the feminists, and the gays and the lesbians who are trying to make an alternative life style, the ACLU, People for the American Way — all of them have tried to secularize America. I point my finger in their face and say, 'You helped this happen.'"
And who, pray tell, are you to point a sticky finger at anyone, Rev. FRF? CEO Jay Hovah? Aka G-D?