Panelists at the Interfaith Marriage Discussion included Rabbi Arnie Sleutelberg from Congregation Shir Tikvah, Central Woodward Christian Church Senior Pastor Bob Cornwall and Kit and George Belvitch from Fortunate Families. (BTL photo: Jason A. Michael)
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Photo Caption: Panelists at the Interfaith Marriage Discussion included Rabbi Arnie Sleutelberg from Congregation
Shir Tikvah, Central Woodward Christian Church Senior Pastor Bob Cornwall and Kit and George Belvitch
from Fortunate Families. (BTL photo: Jason A. Michael)
TROY – About 50 people attended an Interfaith Marriage Discussion that took place at Central Woodward Christian Church May 20. The discussion was hosted by the church in cooperation with Michigan for Marriage and moderated by Kevin Hogan of the Michigan Roundtable. Panelists included Rev. Bob Cornwall, Central Woodward's senior pastor, Rabbi Arnie Sleutelberg of Congregation Shir Tikvah and Kit and George Belvitch from Fortunate Families.
While Sleutelberg is openly gay, the other panelists indicated they all had gay relatives. Cornwall said he was forced to take a closer look at himself and his feelings on gay rights when he learned his brother was gay.
"About 12 years ago my life kind of changed," Cornwall told the crowd. "I was pastoring a church in Santa Barbara and I was told by my mother that my brother had come out as gay. So what had always been pretty much an academic, abstract concept for me now became personal."
For their part, the Belvitch family has a gay son.
"My son Michael, from the time he was a baby, I thought he was probably gay," said Kit Belvitch. "I would pray all the time, 'God, don't let him be gay. Don't let him be gay.' Not that I have a problem with gay people, but I didn't want to see him be hated. I didn't think I could stand to see him rejected and mistreated."
Kit Belvitch said her son, who lives in Chicago, is getting married to his partner later this year.
"I love him, I know, and God loves him," she said. "I want more than anything for all of my kids to be in a loving relationship. So it just kind of follows that I would want Michael and his partner to be able to get married."
Hogan spent much of the night asking panelists to debunk prevalent anti-gay marriage myths, such as the idea that marriage equality for gays threatens traditional marriage.
"Heterosexuals have done a good job of messing marriage up," Cornwall said. "So I don't think we have to blame our LGBT friends for contributing to that. My hope for a gay or lesbian person marrying their partner is that they have the same opportunity to share the same values and commitment for a lifetime.
"Actually, the fact that so many young gay and lesbian persons are seeking to be married should say to the rest of us that this must be really important and we should take that as encouragement to strengthen our own marriages."
Sleutelberg echoed Cornwall's opinion.
"It's always curious to me when people say that somehow marriage is diminished by allowing gay people to marry," he said. "It only strengthens marriage. It's hard to imagine that when a man or a women goes to Las Vegas and gets married by Elvis that this is going to diminish heterosexual marriage. I think it will only make it stronger."
Sleutelberg said that marriage should be defined by what it is, not who participates in it.
"The game of baseball is not defined by who plays it," he said. "It's defined by a certain set of rules and certain type of equipment and a certain type of field. Marriage shouldn't be defined by who participates. It should be defined by what it is in its essence: A desire of two people to commit themselves to one another for life with love and commitment."
Hogan also asked the panelists to talk about the claim that if the Supreme Court rules that gays have a constitutional right to be able to get married, it will force straight clergy to officiate at gay weddings or be found to be violating the law.
"No one forces any church to do anything regarding any wedding," said Cornwall. "In the Catholic Church you can't be remarried if you've been divorced. The federal government recognizes divorce but doesn't force any priests to perform any marriage. I'm not forced to marry anybody. The federal government or the state government can't tell me who I can marry. Really, the only group who can tell me what I can do or not do with regard to that is the congregation that employs me."
Sleutelberg said much of the same.
"When it comes to faith traditions, each church has the right to determine what goes on in its church and has the right to determine official policy of their church," he said. "But it does not have the right to dictate policy of the United States government. So for a particular church group or synagogue group to try to influence America, the Supreme Court, the president, the Senate, the House and tell them that, because of my religious beliefs, you may not allow others with different religious beliefs to exercise their religious beliefs is just so wrong.
"My synagogue is open to gay marriage," Sleutelberg continued. "That doesn't mean I would say that this church has to be or should be. That's for this church to decide. But you shouldn't be able to tell us that we can't."
