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As the world continues to learn more about coronavirus and its spread, it's vital to stay up-to-date on the latest developments. However, it's also important to make sure that the information being distributed is from credible sources. To that end, Between The Lines has compiled, [...]

Billy Masters

By | 2008-02-21T09:00:00-05:00 February 21st, 2008|Entertainment|

“I think (Amy Winehouse) has a great talent, but I don’t agree with the Grammys giving her those nods. I think it sends the wrong message, that even in the midst of her stupor of drugs she can get nominated for all these awards.” – Natalie Cole, who really should know better. In her autobiography, “Angel On My Shoulder,” Natalie talks about “weaving my way down the streets of Harlem, high as a kite, crying like a fool” when she heard her first single, “This Will Be,” on the radio. She remained high for most of the next decade.

Despite all the promotion for the 50th anniversary of the Grammys, it attracted the third lowest viewing audience in history. I sat glued to my TV set waiting to see Aretha. After all, she claimed to have lost weight, and I was dying to see the results. Then she came out – initially camouflaged by an entire gospel choir before lumbering forward. Is it just me or is she bigger than ever? And why, oh why, does she have those big ass titties held up by spaghetti straps? The only thing I can think of is that someone suggested this style and she said, “Mmm, I love me some pisghetti!”

Franklin was more than just a little perturbed when she heard Beyonce bring out Tina Turner by saying, “Stand on your feet for The Queen” – we all know Auntie Re is “The Queen of Soul.” But, Beyonce only said “The Queen” – maybe she was gonna sing a duet with Helen Mirren! Maybe she was paying homage to Tina’s role as “The Acid Queen.” Anyway, Aretha made her feelings quite known – wondering aloud if she stepped on Beyonce or Turner’s toes with her hooves. Beyonce’s dad has said, “It’s a sad day when egos get bruised because somebody used the word king, queen, prince or princess.”

Nothing on this earth makes me happier than seeing The Go-Go’s in concert. Maybe it reminds me of a simpler time back in high school. Whatever the reason, I had a wonderful time seeing them in concert in Miami Beach with the always-delightful Chip “Amazing Race” Arndt. Jane Weidlin had to miss the show since she fly back to L.A. to be with her mother who is terminally ill and took a turn for the worse. The rest of the girls rallied on with guitarist Eve Monsees and performed a kick-ass set – led by a shockingly svelte Belinda Carlisle. In fact, they all looked as good as they sounded, and most certainly still have the beat.

Dolly Parton has postponed a concert tour promoting her new CD, “Backwoods Barbie” due to her enormous bosom. “You try wagging these puppies around a while and see if you don’t have back problems,” Dolly said in a very candid press release. She hopes to be able to reschedule sometime in the spring.

From one buxom blonde to another. Anna Nicole is back in the news. While “The Insider” is filming Larry and Dannielynn swimming with the dolphins, Anna’s former bodyguard was speaking out on “Access Hollywood.” Maurice “Big Moe” Brighthaupt is calling Birkhead a, well, a big ‘mo! He claims that Anna Nicole chose Larry to sire her child because he was so attractive – claiming she loved his blond hair and blue eyes (it was easy to fool Anna). She allegedly told Moe that there’d be no strings with Larry because of his “lifestyle.” When the folks at “Access” asked what she meant by “lifestyle,” Moe said, “Well, she told me that, you know, he was a homosexual.” Of course, this comes as no surprise to my readers who have seen pics of Larry and his ex-boyfriend, model Kerrick Ross, on our Web site.

Don’t believe the headlines – Rosie ain’t no alcoholic. She enjoys beer, but has explained why she’s giving up the beverage: “‘Cause I was drinking too much, ’cause I didn’t want to anymore, ’cause it is hard to lose weight when drinking, ’cause I can never have only one.” OK, well maybe she was a little bit of an alcoholic…

Speaking of alcoholics, Kathleen Turner has written a tell-all, “Send Yourself Roses,” and it’s a doozy. She is shockingly honest about herself, her long-rumored drinking problem (which, to some extent, she admits), and her relationship with certain co-stars – not the least of which was Nicolas Cage, who co-starred with Turner in “Peggy Sue Got Married.” She claims he never listened to the director (Cage’s uncle, Francis Ford Coppola) and got in trouble with the police! “He was arrested twice for drunk driving and, I think, once for stealing a dog. He’d come across a Chihuahua he liked and stuck it in his jacket.” Cage is outraged and has stated: “I have never been arrested for anything in my life, nor have I stolen a dog.” He’s demanding a retraction and threatening to sue. Kathleen retorts: “I’m truly sorry if I caused distress or harm, because one thing is for sure – I never, ever intended to do that.” Nice words, but it ain’t no retraction.

This gives us the perfect opportunity to follow-up an old story. A few months ago, a man broke into Cage’s house, took off his clothes, put on Nic’s leather biker jacket, and surprised the “actor” in his bedroom – funny he knew exactly the layout of the house. Almost like he’d been there before. Anyhoo, the guy’s lawyer says he didn’t know what he was doing because he had sleeping pills and Vicodin in his system – I can’t tell you how many times I’ve used that excuse! The naked intruder has been sentenced to six months of drug rehab. Nic is still looking for his missing Chihuahua.

Do ya like magic? Do ya like celebrities? Then VH-1 has a show for you. “Celebracadabra” will be filmed at the Magic Castle here in L.A. and will feature so-called celebrities learning magic tricks and competing for the title “Best Celebrity Magician.” The “big names” competing include Hal Sparks, Chris “Kid” Reid (of “Kid and Play”), Kim Wyatt (of “The Pussycat Dolls”) and Carnie Wilson, who will likely make an all-you-can-eat buffet disappear in a matter of seconds!

In other magic news, Siegfried and Roy are poised to return to the stage for a one-night-only benefit. The ambiguously gay duo has announced that they’ll perform in Las Vegas for the 2009 “Keep Memory Alive,” a fundraiser for the Lou Ruvo Brain Institute. It is unknown whether they will do a full show or only a few tricks, but they do plan to include their animals.

In other comeback news, rumor has it that the incomparable Mitzi Gaynor is preparing to return to the stage to coincide with the DVD release of her television specials later this year. We’ll keep you posted.

Could it be that Janet Jackson is courting her gay fans? Sources tell me that hot on the heels of her surprise appearance at tres gay weekly L.A. event Tiger Heat, she’s been in talks with the fabu Jeffrey Sanker to performer at his annual White Party festivities in Palm Springs Easter weekend. Nothing’s set in stone, but what else does she have to do?

When I can go from Mitzi to Janet without missing a beat, we’ve definitely come to the end of yet another column. This past weekend, I was in San Francisco judging the GayVNs – the gay porn awards. I’m sure I’ll have some dish from the event, but I would like to say prior to knowing the winners that multiple nominee Michael Lucas went out of his way to send me roses on my birthday – which just happened to be on the eve of voting. Maybe he should be Hillary’s adviser! I’m not saying my vote can be bought, but I sure as hell ain’t saying it can’t. For all the latest dish, head to www.billymasters.com. For your more specific needs, e-mail me at Billy@BillyMasters.com and I promise to get back to you before Aretha and Dolly record “It Take Two” – or four! So, until next time, remember, one man’s filth is another man’s bible.

About the Author:

BTL Staff
Between The Lines has been publishing LGBTQ-related content in Southeast Michigan since the early '90s. This year marks the publication's 27th anniversary.