After Thwarted Kidnapping Plans, Whitmer Calls for Unity

Gov. Gretchen Whitmer addressed the State of Michigan after a plan to kidnap her and other Michigan government officials was thwarted by state and federal law enforcement agencies. She started by saying thank you to law enforcement and FBI agents who participated in stopping this [...]

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Creep of the Week: Rick Santorum

By |2008-05-29T09:00:00-04:00May 29th, 2008|Opinions|

This week’s Creep comes from the “Sticks and Stones” department:

“Bigot! Hate-monger! Homophobe!” is how former Senator Rick Santorum (R-Pennsylvania) began his May 22 tirade in the Philadelphia Inquirer. “Those were just a few of the terms hurled my way in 2003 when I said that the Supreme Court’s Texas sodomy decision opened the door to the redefinition of marriage.”
And now look: the Supreme Court of California has gone and ruled that the state’s gay marriage ban is unconstitutional. If only more people had listened to Rick! Instead he was “laughed at, mocked, and given the crazy-uncle-at-the-holidays treatment by the media.”
Not that he’s the kind of guy to say “I told you so,” but, “I’m just saddened that time has proved right those of us who worried about the future of marriage as the union of husband and wife…” he writes.
Poor Rick. He’s had it rougher than most anti-gay pols. I mean, “Santorum” was appropriated to name “The frothy mix of lube and fecal matter that is sometimes the byproduct of anal sex.” When you Google “Santorum,” it’s the first thing that comes up (no pun intended). If that were my name, I’d be sad, too.
But, gosh, why did Rick have to spend time “ducking the epithets” after he came out against the Texas sodomy decision? Maybe because in 2003 he said shit like this: “[I]f the Supreme Court says that you have the right to consensual sex within your home, then you have the right to bigamy, you have the right to polygamy, you have the right to incest, you have the right to adultery. You have the right to anything.”
And this: “In every society, the definition of marriage has not ever to my knowledge included homosexuality. That’s not to pick on homosexuality. It’s not, you know, man on child, man on dog, or whatever the case may be. It is one thing.”
There’s a reason he’s known to many in the LGBT community as Rick “Man on Dog” Santorum.
Not that we’ve heard much from him lately. When he lost his Senate seat he receded into the shadows. But the California ruling has given new life to his old ideas.
In his column, he even trots out the old Norway study to show how gay marriage will destroy the nation.
“Look at Norway,” he writes. “It began allowing same-sex marriage in the 1990s. In just the last decade, its heterosexual-marriage rates have nose-dived and its out-of-wedlock birthrate skyrocketed to 80 percent for firstborn children. Too bad for those kids who probably won’t have a dad around, but we can’t let the welfare of children stand in the way of social affirmation, can we?”
Uh, no, I guess not. Especially since the study he’s citing is horseshit. But it’s a favorite whenever a guy like Santorum needs to “prove” heteros should be scared of gay marriage. What those who see the Norway study as gospel conveniently ignore is a basic principle: correlation doesn’t equal causation.
Using the study’s logic we might also claim that gays are the cause of high gas prices. Over the years as gays attain more rights, the price at the pump goes higher. Coincidence?
Uh, yeah.
But, hey, at least Santorum still has his priorities straight.

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