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Creep of the Week: VoteOnMarriage.org

By |2005-11-24T09:00:00-05:00November 24th, 2005|News|


The folks at VoteOnMarriage.org have been mounting a full throttle petition drive, fraught with allegations of fraud I might add, to get the issue of marriage on the ballot in Massachusetts.
VoteOnMarriage.org is “the official sponsoring organization of the Massachusetts Protection of Marriage Amendment,” according to their Web site.
Their goal is to yank marriage rights for gays and eliminate the possibility of civil unions a full two years after the Massachusetts Supreme Court gave the thumbs up to marriage equality.
The folks who cried that two men tying the knot would mark the end of days have long since been proven wrong. The sky did not fall in Massachusetts. God did not smite the members of the Supreme Court with boils. So why is VOM bothering?
Because they don’t like gay people. They won’t come out and say it, though, and that really irks me. They hide under the guise of “protecting” marriage from “attack.” In truth, it’s the lesbian and gay families who need protecting – from VOM’s attack machine. But the Massachusetts GOP is fully behind the drive with Mitt Romney shamelessly waving the homophobic banner.
Massachusetts Dems, meanwhile, are on record as opposing the amendment, but it would kill them to take a stand on something that took actual conviction. In other words, they’re not for it, but they’re certainly not going to actively work against it.
“In eighteen states across America,” reads VOM’s Web site, “people of all races, creeds and religions have spoken clearly by amending their state constitutions with overwhelming majorities to defend marriage from attack by a minority of people and activists judges [sic] who seek to totally redefine the family.”
Ohmigod, I’m, like, totally freaked. Marriage is, like, totally being attacked! The gays are, like, totally ruining it for everyone – as Massachusetts’ standing as the state with the lowest divorce rates shows.
Thankfully VOM is here to protect marriage “from those what are willing to conduct an untested, social experiment upon our children.” Yeah, like public schools. Oh, wait, VOM.org is probably against those, too. Never mind.
Their mission statement (it’s a crusade statement, really) gets better, or at least more creative: “We wish to see marriage confirmed as it was intended by nature, biology, tradition and just common sense – between one man and one woman.”
Marriage as it was intended by nature? Uh, marriage is a social and/or religious institution. The rings, the dress, the vows, the cake – only humans do this. Nature is more in charge of things like locust swarms and hurricanes.
Also, I took a biology class in college and don’t remember covering marriage. We did cover lipids (lipids are hydrophobic, which sounds a lot like homophobic so maybe that’s where VOM is coming from. Witches are hydrophobic, too, according to “The Wizard of Oz” and the people of Salem, circa 1692). I did drop the class, taking environmental science instead, so it’s totally possible I missed that part.
But should you think VOM is ungenerous, take heed: “Any two persons who are dependent on one another deserve basic benefits, but to award these benefits based on sexual orientation is discriminatory.”
Hey, wait a minute, isn’t heterosexuality a sexual orientation? Which means… Ohmigod! VOM is, like, totally FOR gay marriage!
No wonder the group has been accused so many times of fraud…

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