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Deep Inside Hollywood

By Romeo San Vicente

A very Tori Christmas

It just wouldn't be the holiday season without some network cranking out yet another TV movie variation of Charles Dickens' "A Christmas Carol." We've already heartily enjoyed Susan Lucci and Vanessa Williams as they tackled the role of Scrooge; now the folks at Hallmark, God bless 'em every one, are giving us the gift of Tori Spelling as the infamous miser. Spelling – who starred in such delicious TV movies as "Mother, May I Sleep with Danger?" and "Co-ed Call Girl," and stole all her scenes in the gay comedy "Trick" – will play Carol, a mean-spirited talk-show host in "A Carol Christmas." It starts shooting this month and will air in December on the Hallmark Channel. You can't wait.

Pamela & Betty make 'Ruthie & Connie'

It was a heartwarming crowd-pleaser at queer film festivals and the few big cities where it played in theaters, and now a dramatized version of the documentary "Ruthie & Connie" is in the works. The true story concerns two 1950s housewives whose budding love affair results in them divorcing their husbands and building a life together. Busy lesbian screenwriter Pamela Gray – she wrote "A Walk on the Moon" and "Music of the Heart," and her feature scripts for "Betty Anne Waters" and "Paris to the Moon" are also in development – is working on the script, while Betty Thomas ("The Brady Bunch Movie," "Private Parts") is attached to direct. All that's left is for Bea Arthur and Rue McClanahan to say yes.

Straight people need more apartments

This sounds, um, promising: "Bruce Almighty" screenwriter Steve Koren is developing a gay-themed sitcom for Fox. So far so good. "Bruce Almighty" was funny, after all. The new show has no name yet, but the premise consists of two straight guys who can't find housing anywhere so they're forced to move into an apartment building that caters exclusively to lesbians and gay men. Hey, it could happen! Presumably they have to pretend to be gay themselves to secure a lease in this exclusive building – located, I guess, somewhere on Gay Mars. Think "Bosom Buddies" meets "Boat Trip" meets "Too Close For Comfort" meets "Three's Company." And just keep repeating, ""Bruce Almighty" was funny, "Bruce Almighty" was funny …" and maybe it will all turn out all right.

The 'Doctor' is in again

It's been huge in England since 1963 and a favorite of geeks in the USA as well. Now look for "Doctor Who" to make an even bigger splash when the Russell T. Davies-penned remake hits the airwaves. Davies, creator of the original British "Queer as Folk," would seem the perfect choice for the material: he's an acknowledged fan of the series, even including references to it in "QAF," in which the character Vince was obsessed with the adventures of the time-traveling physician. According to the BBC, this will be a family-oriented "Doctor Who" (read: no explicit man-on-man sex, so please don't write angry, antigay letters). No cast members have signed on yet, so eager fans will have to content themselves with old episodes on video until at least 2005.

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