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Parting Glances: Blind leading the bland

Creature of literary habit that I am (at least on Thursdays) I pick up BTL at the same bookstore where I'm also given a generous 20% book discount.
Often I find at the top of the BTL stack a bit of anonymous homophobia – sneaky and stealth – done by some skunk of a troglodyte who takes secret delight in his two-second deed of antigay protest.
It happens too often to be accidental and occurs elsewhere BTLs are dropped off. I call it the cover up caper. (If you encounter it, please take proper – and BTL cautions you – nonviolent action.) Here's how it works.
Homophobe enters bookstore. (Profile: usually post-acnescent, early-to-mid 20s, probable fundygelical upbringing, tempered with overly macho, football-yardage predisposition, and steady but undistinguished 2.31 G.P.A. through senior year. Job prospect: hardware clerk, claims injury attorney, Lapland tribal missionary.)
Homophobe stands by free newspapers – of which there are several competing choices – looks both ways, idly hums American Idol theme, college fight song, or gospel hymn (most popular, "Onward Christian Soldiers") and does a usually undetectable act of stealth hostility.
Hit and run! He plops a copy of another weekly on top of the pile of BTLs, hiding our viewpoint and voice. Smirks. Tells anyone in earshot to have a blessed day. And, 20 minutes late for his English Comp 101 mandatory rehab class, darts off.
"Hey, what they don't see can't hurt them", he mutters, all the while wishing he had the guts to pick up the whole BTL kit and caboodle and drop it in a trash can. "Yeah; that's too much effort. Too non-Christian. Besides I don't hate the sinner, I just hate the syntax. Who'll know any way? My one good deed for the day.")
Lest anyone think I'm picking on male homophonies. Take this family values biblical bimboette. (I'll say this for this Puritan Prunella, she's at least above board in her dislike of gays, gay artists, poets, and art).
Her e-mail campaign to boycott (er, godcott) the DIA came to BTL's attention last week by forwarded e-mail. She goes by Regina, which one supposes entitles her to speak with an imperial Victorian we-this, thou-that tone when dealing with aesthetic or queenly (i.e., gay) matters.
Her e-mail subject is, "Christians Hear This – Gay and Lesbian Pride Month at the DIA!" She continues (s)ex cathedra: "I'm hoping to get it out to as many as possible. It's my prayer that we as Christians will stand up and say a loud NO to the following.
"Anyone who has a membership at the Detroit Institute of Arts should know their money is going to sponsor programming this month that will include poetry reading and two artist demonstrations [actually three, sweetie] depicting homosexual issues." Tisk. Tisk.
Said defender of public aesthetic and artistic morals has canceled her $84 family membership and asks those like minded Internet philistines to do the same. "Perhaps if enough of us rise up and cancel our membership . . . we will not support deviant programming, we can change that programming."
As one of the quote-unquote deviant artists (June 21st, 1:00 – 5:00), I have a modest proposal for her ladyship: Get the DIA to remove from its world-famous collection the works of Bacon, Caravaggio, Hockney, Cadmus, Haring, Mapplethorpe, spiritual greats DaVinci and Michaelangelo. Why gaycott us little guys? Go straight for the jugulars. (Bite hard, honey.)
Art is for everyone! Support your DIA. Renew your membership. Say Regina made me do it. God (and the IRS) will bless you. Sight unseen.

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Topics: Opinions
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