Go find the nearest bathroom and flush the toilet. Listen carefully. What you hear is much better than any Kid Rock song. (If you're asking yourself, "Who is Kid Rock?" you aren't alone. Stop reading this immediately and forget you ever heard the name. You'll be better for it.)
Kid Rock, who is a living hate scarecrow wrapped in denim, was doing karaoke at a Tennessee bar when somebody had the audacity to take out their phone and record him.
His response, seen in a video posted by TMZ, was to stick up his middle finger and holler, "Fuck you!" and, pointing to his crotch, "You can post this dick right now."
He then yells, "You fucking faggots with your iPhones out!" This is, of course, beyond disgusting, and Kid Rock should be ashamed of himself, but we know he isn't.
In case we needed more proof, Kid Rock spread some "love" on Twitter June 9: "If Kid Rock using the word faggot offends you, good chance you are one. Either way, I know he has a lot of love for his gay friends, and I will have a talk with him. Have a nice day." He signed the tweet "Bob Ritchie," which is his real name. In other words, it's another "fuck you."
It's wild that Kid Rock would expect, in 2021, everyone in a crowded bar to kindly put away all recording devices so he could give them a special, one night only, never-to-be-seen again karaoke performance. As if we don't live in a world where anything you do in public — and even sometimes in private! — is just as likely as not to have been captured on video.
This incident is, of course, not Kid Rock's first foray into offensiveness.
Remember when Kid Rock was going to run for Congress? During a 2017 concert in Detroit, Kid Rock gave a sort of stump speech that expressed support for marriage equality, but not for transgender people so much as existing.
"Why, these days, is everything so gay? Gay rights, transgender this and that. I say, let gay folks get married if they want to," he told the crowd. "But things shouldn't be this complicated, and no, you don't get to choose because whatever you have between your legs should determine the bathroom that you use."
In the same speech, he calls out for Jesus to guide him. He also fantasizes about being "President Kid Rock." He paints a picture of what that would look like: "Standing on the desk in the Oval Office like a G. Holding my dick ready to address the whole country."
In 2015 he told The Guardian, "As an ordained minister, I don't look forward to marrying gay people, but I'm not opposed to it."
In 2012 he told Billboard, "As much as I believe that marriage is between a man and a woman, let gay people get married if they want."
So he tepidly supports marriage for gay people. Great. But he doesn't have any respect for gay people.
In the same interview with The Guardian, he defends using "gay" as a pejorative. "If someone says you can't say 'gay' like that, you tell them to go fuck themselves. You're not going to get anything politically correct out of me."
And it's true. Kid Rock has made a career of being a "bad boy" unafraid to say or do anything because he's a straight, white, rich guy. And in the United States, we've been conditioned to reward such people by exempting them from any and all consequences. Hell, we even let them become President.
Judging from the state of today's Republican Party, President Kid Rock, dick and all, doesn't seem all that far-fetched.
All the more reason to ABOLISH THE FILIBUSTER. NOW.
