When Kirk Latimer's buddy killed himself with a single bullet, it felt like he had been shot, too. It hurt, and the former Portage, Mich. teacher, who back then was finishing his last year at Henry Ford II High School in Sterling Heights, couldn't stop thinking about the umpteen occasions when he'd call him a "faggot" for not causing trouble with their bad-ass clique, or not wanting to score with a hot chick. There was a reason for that: Latimer's friend was gay, and no one knew – until they read his suicide note.
Today, Latimer, 28, is focusing zilch attention on the next babe he'll get with (especially since he's married now, with a kid) – and all of his regretful energy into positive change:
"Sharing all this makes me sick. To think about how I used to hurt others, and how ignorant I truly was to homosexuality, society and even myself."
Teamed with pal and professional partner Gabriel Giron, an undergraduate student at Western Michigan University, the guys, known collectively as Kinetic Affect, will present their slam poetry during "Speak it Forward" from Oct. 24 to 26 at Kalamazoo's Farmers Alley Theatre.
"We feel so passionate about what we do and we see the effect and we're getting a lot of positive response that I've decided to forgo grad school to pursue this," says Giron, 26. Latimer, too, quit his job as an English teacher at a school in Portage to fully immerse himself in this project and a future non-profit organization venture.
Their progressive piece, "The Darndest Things," which will be performed during their Kalamazoo shows, is based on the man he used to be, throwing his regretfully bad example – and even those of his former students – into a wider scope of society.
"Whenever I hear 'that's gay,' I always ask myself, 'How do they know it's gay?'" the guys ask in the chilling piece. "Can you really tell the sexual orientation of an inanimate object?"
Latimer's pupils could, or so they thought. Just as the Gay, Lesbian and Straight Education Network releases several celeb-starring PSAs about the ongoing and prevalent problem among youth – the "that's-so-gay" dilemma – Latimer and Giron are turning their slam into a service announcement of sorts, telling young folks that the use of "faggot" or using "gay" to mean stupid hurts. And, in Latimer's case, kills.
"This friend of mine, when he took his life, we didn't suspect that that was going on in his head at all," Latimer says, adding his note revealed he didn't tell anyone for fear of losing his buddies. And there's a heartbreaking truth to it all: "He probably would've been right. And that's the sad thing." Latimer blamed himself for a while, carrying the blame of the death like a pack mule. He also charged society for the monster it made him.
"I've learned to see that things are a lot more systemic than we think," he says. "And that the guilt I feel is also part of our societal mores. … I don't carry the same burden I used to. But I do still have nightmares about it."
Latimer and Giron, who competed against each other at a local poetry slam before becoming a team ("I whipped Kirk's ass," Giron jokes), come from similar backgrounds. Giron, who once used his aggressive side as a shield, was instrumental in changing Latimer, and vice versa. At 18, he enlisted in the military and just eight months later came close to dying when diagnosed with an advanced form of cancer. After, he learned to let people in, getting closer than ever before to his buddies. Even hugging them. For Latimer, who was already making personal progress, it was a little weird at first.
"I was still pretty uncomfortable with someone coming up and hugging me," he admits. "I had experiences that made me feel like that, and Gabriel would just come right up and give you this big ol' giant hug and hold on. Hold on maybe a little longer than I was expecting."
Giron adds: "Let's just say when people … introduce us as partners, they're almost as close as they can get to all kinds of partners."
"Without some of the benefits," Latimer quips.
Speak it Forward
8 p.m. Oct. 24-25, 7 p.m. Oct. 26
Farmers Alley Theatre, Kalamazoo
http://www.myspace.com/kineticaffect
