Capitol Correspondent
LANSING– Marie Wolf prefers a quiet, private life. She never imagined herself as an advocate for LBGT issues. But circumstances have a way of changing one's life perspective, and Wolf's has indeed changed.
"You will do anything for your kids," she said. "If my speaking out helps me bring those precious ones back into my life or help someone else to keep their kids, then it is worth it."
Wolf, a 46-year-old assistant Ingham County prosecutor, has become an accidental activist as a result of a protracted and ugly second parent adoption battle with her former partner Jeannie Wolf, 37.
Wolf, who is a retired Lansing police officer as well, said she had been trying to get pregnant for many years when she met Jeannie in 2000. As the two grew closer, Wolf continued her attempts to get pregnant and finally, Jeannie took over. Finally in 2004, after saving every penny they could, the two had a successful in vitro fertilization procedure. Jeannie was pregnant with twins.
The twins arrived in March 2005, and the little girl (Wolf asked that their names not be used,) was born "black and lifeless and not breathing." Hospital staff had to put her on life support.
"I remember feeling like I had gone from one thousand miles of joy to a brick wall," she says choking back tears. "That we were going to loose our baby daughter."
The little girl rallied and was able to join her brother in going home five days later.
What followed was a year of very sick children, but Marie says she loved every moment of it, and adored them. They were diagnosed with severe food allergies at about one year of age, and with a carefully managed diet, they were able to overcome most of their health issues.
Nonetheless, Marie and Jeannie went to a Shiawassee courtroom to co-adopt the twins. Jeannie had changed her name to Wolf, so the kids could have the same last name. The kids were named Wolf. And the adoption was approved. Marie and Jeannie and the two kids were a legal family unit in Michigan.
The break-up
In February of 2006, Jeannie called the relationship off. But she assured mutual friends of the couple that she would never keep Marie from seeing the kids. She even referred to Marie as the "best co-parent she could imagine," Wolf said.
But then in March of 2006, Jeannie failed to arrive home at a pre-scheduled time. Instead, she called Wolf on the phone and told her she and the kids were not coming home. Wolf could have her attorney call Jeannie's attorney.
What resulted was a protracted battle for custody of the children. Wolf filed an action in Ingham County, but was rebuffed four days later, and without a response by Jeannie's attorneys, by Ingham County Family Court Judge Richard J. Garcia.
Judge Garcia ruled Michigan adoption law did not allow for single persons to adopt, and so the adoption was null and void. In addition, he ruled Wolf had no standing and threw her case out.
Wolf appealed but was again rebuffed by the courts.
Shortly after that ruling, Wolf received a troubling call from the Meridian Township Police department, a suburb of Lansing. Jeannie had threatened to kill herself and the children and was being committed for psychiatric evaluation. Wolf was allowed to take custody of the children.
She filed a guardianship for the kids and received that.
But then Jeannie's attorneys fought back.
The fight gets dirty
Even though Wolf now had a double legal standing, both as a guardian of the children and in Shiawassee County, as a co-adoptive parent, Jeannie fought against the actions of Wolf to get custody of the kids.
This time, after getting Judge Garcia booted from the case, a second, visiting judge, heard the case. He too ruled that the Shiawassee County guardianship was not legal, nor was the adoption. He then sanctioned Wolf with court costs and attorney fees for Jeannie.
The costs were $100,000.
In September of 2006, Wolf saw the twins for the last time. She has no idea where they are living, or what condition they are in. She knows that Jeannie and the kids have moved at least four times since the beginning of the process, and a former nanny, Breaha Montague-Bauer in a letter, said Jeannie has had her utilities shut off.
Wolf even offered Meijer's gift card to Jeannie, through her former partner's attorneys. Jeannie declined them.
While Wolf's case continues to wind its way through the Michigan courts, she is also taking her case to the legislature and publicly as well. She said she has to do it because of her commitment to her faith.
"The religious right are not the only ones who can claim families," she says, her voice angry. "The family is not just mom and dad and two point five kids and the Ozzie and Harriet dream. Families come in all shapes and flavors."
Her faith is what is sustaining her, she said. "I pray a lot. I pray this will help others, and I pray I will see those precious kids again."
